


Peep-eo and Julipeep by Shakespeep

by emeebee



Category: Marshmallow Peeps - Fandom, Peeps - Fandom, Romeo And Juliet - Shakespeare
Genre: Gen, Shakespeep, gratuitous abuse of literature
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-08
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-05-31 22:31:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6489925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emeebee/pseuds/emeebee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two peepdoms, both alike in marshmallowy centers<br/>(In fair Peepona where we lay our fic),<br/>From ancient sugared grudge bakes new mutiny,<br/>Where sugar blood makes sugar hands unclean.<br/>From the foes of chicks and bunnies<br/>A pair of sugar-crossed lovers form a gang<br/>And have misadventures in an attempt to overthrow their species' strife.<br/>However, best laid plans and all that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Peep-eo and Julipeep by Shakespeep

Two peepdoms, both alike in marshmallowy centers

(In fair Peepona where we lay our fic),

From ancient sugared grudge bakes new mutiny,

Where sugar blood makes sugar hands unclean.

From the foes of chicks and bunnies

A pair of sugar-crossed lovers form a gang

And have misadventures in an attempt to overthrow their species' strife.

However, best laid plans and all that.

 

Some bunnies were putting gas in their starched-sock-mobile when some chicks in an overturned hat with wheels rolled up.

"Dumb hat," a bunny peep yelled.

"Smelly sock," a chick peep retorted.

"Stop fighting," snuffled the Easter Pig. "Or else."

The bunnies and chicks glared at one another.

Later, a bunny peep named Peep-eo was bemoaning his lack-of-a-love-life to his friends.

"I mean, Rosapeep is totally pink and gorgeous," Peep-eo said. "But she wants to be a nun."

"That's bunk. But the Chick-ulets are having a party. Let's crash it!"

And so they did.

Which is where Peep-eo peeped himself a super fly chick.

"What's your name," he asked her.

"Julipeep. You're a bunny."

"And you're a chick."

"Do you hate me?"

"Nope. Do you hate me?"

"Nope. Wanna play badminton?"

"Sure."

And so Peep-eo and Julipeep played a friendly round of badminton while their families probably threatened to kill one another or something. Well. Actually that did happen. One of them walked up to Peep-eo.

"Wanna fight, bunny?"

"Not really," Peep-eo said.

"Not even if we promise to give you the recipe for the Easter Pig's special Jelly Bean Dip if you win?"

Peep-eo thought for a moment. "Nah."

Not really sure how to respond, the Chick-ulet and his peeps walked away.

But Julipeep wasn't able to brush it off as easily as Peep-eo. After the party was over she stood on her balcony and bemoaned the situation. "Peep-eo, Peep-eo, why are you a bunny-o?"

Little did she know that Peep-eo was listening to her.

"Hark," he said. "What sugared honey on yonder balcony speaks? It is in the east and Julipeep is totally yellow like the sun."

Julipeep overheard him. "And you're totally purple like purple paint."

"This family feud thing is dumb," Peep-eo said.

"Family feud is a television show. This is a fight between inanimate marshmallow foodstuff shapes."

"Fair."

"Anyway. I think we should start a gang," Julipeep said.

"I wanna be Pepe," Peep-eo said. "Pepe le Peep."

Julipeep thought for a moment. "And I'll be Chickie," she said. "Chickie McThugget."

And so the next day they began their riotous acts of gangsterdom. They wore masks to protect their identities. They figured that their first stop on their do-gooder-gangsterdom journey should be to visit the local friar to see if he had any idea of what good deeds needed doing and what would be the most valued by the community.

"We wanna do great things together," Peep-eo said.

"We make great partners," Julipeep assured the friar.

"We think the Easter Pig would approve."

The friar, of course, mistook their true intentions. Peep-eo and Julipeep just wanted his advice on how to do good but instead, the friar saw their masks and assumed they were wanting to be the next Bunny and Chick (Bonny and Clyde), and so said "I now pronounce you peep and peep" before scurrying off.

Undeterred, Peep-eo and Julipeep plowed straight ahead with their plans to do good deeds in the name of reuniting their families in friendship.

"We could get coffee together," Peep-eo suggested.

So they did.

Nothing changed. Though the bar-peep-sta was thoroughly confused.

"We could ride a tandem bicycle," Julipeep decided.

So they did.

But they didn't quite have the limbs needed to keep it from toppling and so they changed transportation to a starched knicker-mobile. After all, apart from preventing wedgies, Sarah Millican's wedgie-proof knickers plus wheels makes a great traveling contraption.

But just riding around town in motorized underpants wasn't doing anything to bring their families together.

"I could kill your cousin," Peep-eo finally decided.

Julipeep gave him a look. "That wouldn’t solve anything. We should probably avoid any kind of peep-tracide."

"Fair enough." He thought for a moment. "Could I at least steal his Easter Grass nest? It's pretty awesome."

"That's it," Julipeep shouted, scaring off some nearby Jelly Babies. "The Easter Pig's Jelly Bean Dip recipe!"

"I mean, the Easter Pig makes a mean Jelly Bean Dip but what does that have to do with anything?"

"Well, it's the source of all the fighting between our families. My family stole it from the Easter Pig and your family wants it and we should steal it and give it back!"

"The ultimate good deed," Peep-eo said.

"Exactly."

And so they schemed.

But they forgot they were in public place and didn’t realize that the peeps at the next table overheard every word!

Aghast that Peep-eo would engage in acts of thievery, Bunnyvolio ran to the Easter Pig and told him of Peep-eo's plans.

"And was Peep-eo alone in these schemes," asked the Easter Pig.

"There was another peep with him but they were wearing a mask so I don't know who it was."

"Shame." The Easter Pig thought. Peep-eo clearly wasn't above stealing. Perhaps it was Peep-eo who stole his Jelly Bean Dip recipe! "I've decided. Peep-eo is banished from Peepona."

"What?!"

"What?"

"What!"

"What?!"

"Why would you banish Peep-eo?"

"Well I don't know who the other peep is so I can't exactly banish them now, can I."

"Well that makes sense, I guess," Bunnyvolio conceded.

"Let him know for me, will you?" And the Easter Pig skateboarded away (He went viral on YouTube for his video of himself skateboarding. That was how he had become the Prince of Peepona).

So Bunnyvolio delivered the bad news. And Peep-eo, not wanting to do anything bad so as to not strain the relationships between their families any further by disobeying the Easter Pig, left Peepona. He also left Julipeep to figure out how to mend hostilities betwixt their families.

Thankfully, she was sensible enough to not come up with some fake-suicide plan.

Instead, she walked through the kitchen, shoved the recipe down her bodice, and delivered it to the Easter Pig.

"That is what Peep-eo was going to steal," she told him. "We thought if we returned your stolen Jelly Bean Dip recipe then maybe our families would stop fighting. Peep-eo just wanted to set things right."

Overjoyed, the Easter Pig lifted Peep-eo's banishment, ordered the Monta-bunnies and Chick-ulets to become friends (because peeps always do what they're told?), Peep-eo and Julipeep continued to do not-exactly-good-but-not-bad deeds, and the Easter Pig published a recipe book.

Jelly Bean Dip recipe included.

 

For ne'er was a story of more gusto

Than this of Julipeep and her Peep-eo.

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently the Easter Pig is not a big thing. When I was little we always did Easter with my maternal Grandmother. But rather than receive Easter baskets from the Easter Bunny, my grandma's coffee table would be laid out with Easter Grass, Peeps, chocolate eggs, jelly beans, and all the other Easter candies. This table was said to be prepared by the Easter Pig.  
> Also. On 8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown Series 7 Episode 10 Sarah Millican brings wedgie-proof knickers as part of her mascot and I have shamelessly stolen the idea to give to my crack-fic peeps. If you find the episode, the part with the knickers starts about 13 minutes, 30 seconds in.


End file.
